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I was working as a delivery driver last friday when I got lost on a delivery and had to ask someone for directions. I saw what looked like a fairly normal bloke and asked him where the address was. He then attempted to repeat the address I had said in a questioning manner but got it totally wrong. Not only that but he had the strongest cornish accent I have ever heard. (For all you people not familar with cornwall think of a proper country accent). I then repeated the address to him again and got a bemused look on the guys face as if I had asked him where Tim Buck Two was. He told me he had never heard of this address in all the time he had lived there. I said Thankyou and drove 100 yards up the road to which I discovered the address I was looking for. 100 YARDS!! Unbelievable!
Why is it whenever you ask someone for directions it always turns out to be the Village Idiot
The answers posted by me are suggestions only and cannot be used in anyway against me.
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if i started a thread and their is a reply to my post i don't like can i delete this post from my side?
The Web Developer. Beirout-Lebanon
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| Sign In·View Thread·PermaLink | 1.27/5 (5 votes) |
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Oh If only that were possible!
There would be a Denial of Service problem on the CP Server as we all tried to delete your posts!
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The meek shall inherit the Earth. And the rest of us will go to the stars.
- Omni Magazine
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| Sign In·View Thread·PermaLink | 4.50/5 (4 votes) |
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Responses like that will make everyone despise you, try talking to others like you speak to your parents.
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How do you know that's not what he's doing ?
Christian Graus
No longer a Microsoft MVP, but still happy to answer your questions.
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The Web Developer wrote: and i try deleting you posts too m..... f......
Start sentences with a capital.
Don't start sentences with a conjunction.
Ensure you grammar is in the correct tense and indicate to whom it is intended.
The perpendicular pronoun should also be a majuscule.
Do you mean "your".
5 errors in one line, a new record even for you!
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The meek shall inherit the Earth. And the rest of us will go to the stars.
- Omni Magazine
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| Sign In·View Thread·PermaLink | 5.00/5 (1 vote) |
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Try to think before you talk.
No, you can't delete a post that has replies. No, you can't delete other peoples posts. There are logical reasons for this. Perhaps you've done enough fiddling with the contents of posts, don't you think ?
Christian Graus
No longer a Microsoft MVP, but still happy to answer your questions.
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| Sign In·View Thread·PermaLink | 3.67/5 (2 votes) |
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Get a life ? Try not to say things that cause people to respond with frustration ? Take some of the advice that's been thrown at you since you got here ( I mean the serious advice, not the totally frustrated advice you're getting now ) ? Grow some cahones ?
Who cares if someone says something you don't like in an online forum ? Who cares if you get one voted, if you're not going to take the peer pressure that's being offered, at least don't whine about it.
Christian Graus
No longer a Microsoft MVP, but still happy to answer your questions.
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| Sign In·View Thread·PermaLink | 5.00/5 (1 vote) |
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The Web Developer wrote: what should i do then
FOAD?
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The meek shall inherit the Earth. And the rest of us will go to the stars.
- Omni Magazine
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Christian Graus wrote: Try to think before you talk
Not possible while his head is in his ass.
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| Sign In·View Thread·PermaLink | 4.00/5 (3 votes) |
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Click on the start menu, select "run", type "cmd" and hit enter. Type "format c:" and answer all questions with "y".
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Whoever down-voted the previous joke, I believe that you'll buy this one at least. I feel that it is clean, kid-sister friendly, etc., 
During the Great Depression, there was a man who walked into a bar one day. He went up to the bartender and said, "Bartender, I'd like to buy the house a round of drinks."
The bartender said, "That's fine, but we're in the middle of the Depression, so I'll need to see some money first."
The guy pulled out a huge wad of bills and set them on the bar. The bartender can't believe what he's seeing. "Where did you get all that money?" asked the bartender.
"I'm a professional gambler," replied the man.
The bartender said, "There's no such thing! I mean, your odds are fifty-fifty at best, right?"
"Well, I only bet on sure things," said the guy.
"Like what?" asked the bartender.
"Well, for example, I'll bet you fifty dollars that I can bite my right eye," he said.
The bartender thought about it. "Okay," he said.
So, the guy pulled out his false right eye and bit it. "Aw, you screwed me," said the bartender, and paid the guy his $50.
"I'll give you another chance. I'll bet you another fifty dollars that I can bite my left eye," said the stranger.
The bartender thought again and said, "Well, I know you're not blind, I mean, I watched you walk in here. I'll take that bet." So, the guy pulled out his false teeth and bit his left eye.
"Aw, you screwed me again!" protested the bartender.
"That's how I win so much money, bartender. I'll just take a bottle of your best scotch in lieu of the fifty dollars," said the man.
With that, the guy went to the back room and spent the better part of the night playing cards with some of the locals. After many hours of drinking and card playing, he stumbled up to the bar. Drunk as a skunk, he said, "Bartender, I'll give you one last chance. I'll bet you five hundred dollars that I can stand on this bar on one foot and piss into that whiskey bottle on that shelf behind you without spilling a drop."
The bartender once again pondered the bet. The guy couldn't even stand up straight on two feet, much less one. "Okay, you're on," he said.
The guy climbed up on the bar, stood on one leg, and began pissing all over the place. He hit the bar, the bartender, himself, but not a drop made it into the whiskey bottle.
The bartender was ecstatic. Laughing, the bartender said, "Hey pal, you owe me five hundred dollars!"
The guy climbed down off the bar and said, "That's okay. I just bet each of the guys in the card room a thousand bucks each that I could piss all over you and the bar and still make you happy and laugh!"
[This one is another re-post, but worth it. I had posted it last year if I remember it right]
Many are stubborn in pursuit of the path they have chosen, few in pursuit of the goal - Friedrich Nietzsche .·´¯`·->Rajesh<-·´¯`·.[Microsoft MVP - Visual C++]
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| Sign In·View Thread·PermaLink | 5.00/5 (4 votes) |
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Heard it similar to an old lady and a bank manager, but yeah still funny.
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The meek shall inherit the Earth. And the rest of us will go to the stars.
- Omni Magazine
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blackjack2150 wrote: See Quentin Tarantino in Desperado.
[Military officer tone] Repost[^] [/Military officer tone] Mwhahaha!
Many are stubborn in pursuit of the path they have chosen, few in pursuit of the goal - Friedrich Nietzsche .·´¯`·->Rajesh<-·´¯`·.[Microsoft MVP - Visual C++]
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| Sign In·View Thread·PermaLink | 3.67/5 (3 votes) |
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